Some People Will Read Anything – Trifecta

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Waiting at the market I crave distraction, look around, and scan the headlines on display
“Nude Suicide Plot!” reads one, “How to Satisfy Your Man!” another screams, “Ohio Woman’s Martian Lover!”

Oh my.

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Written in response to the Trifecta Challenge

Rules are:
• Your response must be exactly 33 words.
• You must use the 3rd definition of the given word in your post.
• The word itself needs to be included in your response.
• You may not use a variation of the word; it needs to be exactly as stated above.

The given word is:  SATISFY  (transitive verb)

The third definition is:
3a : to make happy : please
b : to gratify to the full : appease