Random Scribbles · Speakeasy · writing

The ‘900 Series’

“One quarter the take,” Rocky answered.

“What’s that going to be?” I asked; a seemingly endless supplier of questions.

“No less than 50 million.” He set the semiautomatic .45 ACP on the counter and turned it so that the grip was facing me. It was a beautiful pistol with a matte black finish and polished rosewood grips.

“So that would be 12 point 5 for me?” I was still asking questions.

“No, that would be 50 for you. The total will be four times that.”

“And what is it exactly that you want me to do for this 50 million?” I was trying to conceal my interest so I reached over and picked up the piece that he had set down.

“Crack the safe. That’s what you do innit?” Rocky squinted his left eye and peered at me from the other?

“Yeah… yeah it is, for the most part. What kind is it?”

“It’s an ole Diebold, closet safe with a 900 series lock.”

“Nobody’s going to keep that kind of money in an antique,” I said, “What’s the catch?”

Rocky started asking questions, “Are you in, or what?”

“Yeah, I’m in, Rocky. Just ’cause it’s you – and ’cause we go way back.” I racked the slide on the 45. It was smooth.

“There’s a newer safe awright,” Rocky said. “A Hamilton. It’s harder to break, but still doable. The new safe is a decoy though. Ya spend yer time breaking that, all fer nothin’ – while the money sits in a closet, the next room over, in the ole Diebold. It’s only gonna be in there for one night though so our timetable is set. Come on, I’ll show you the layout. We got less than a month.”

I walked around the counter and we went through the curtain to the back room. A workbench and some tools lined one wall. A small round table occupied the other end of the narrow space.

Seated at the table was a tall thin man with close cropped dark hair and a handlebar mustache, I pegged him at about 40 years old. Next to him sat an older woman. She was wedged into a pastel colored summer dress that fit her like a sausage case, her hair washed a light blue. Based on the resemblance and the age difference, I figured they were mother and son. I knew who they must be.

“He’s in,” Rocky told them and you could see them relax as the tension fled out the high transom windows into the alleyway.

“You must be the McCoy’s.” I said and stuck out my hand. “I can’t tell you what an honor it is to meet you both.”

“Join us?” said Martha McCoy indicating the two empty chairs.

14 thoughts on “The ‘900 Series’

    1. I don’t know yet Stacie. I kinda like these guys but this story was just a feeble attempt to play with dialogue and answer the ultimate question. How’d I do?


  1. Are you referencing the Hatfield’s and McCoy’s, or did you just pick it because it’s a cool name that sounds like a safe-cracker would have? Either way, I personally think you did well with the dialogue- their separate voices came through, and as an incessant question asker myself, I liked that kept you driving that point of the character’s personality.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No reference to feuds here at all. As you correctly guessed, I just thought it would be a good name. Me, Rocky and the McCoys!


  2. The characters you created have intrigued me. It would be interesting to see how they develop further in a longer tale. I think you could make this more than a one-shot. And the dialogue was far from feeble. It was executed very well.


  3. Gracias Renada. I like these guys too and they could show up again. I hope I remember to get around to them next time!


    1. I’ve been making a conscious effort to write dialogue for the last couple of years. I am trying to listen to the way people speak and it is really amazing how varied it is.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.