Andrew sat up in the bed and groped for the TV remote in the dark. He found it and pressed the power button. The screen began to glow and as it warmed up he looked at the time. 0215.
Late night TV was always good for paid programming and B movies. The movies were always brought to you by miracle products, cut rate lawyers, or car salesmen; sometimes all of the above. Andrew had watched a lot of these late night movies and he knew the drill. Tonight’s movie was ‘Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungles of Death’. This was a good one. He had seen it before and it looked like it was still near the beginning. He slid his butt down, settled in, and got comfortable just as they went into a commercial break.
He learned that if he needed to declare bankruptcy or beat a DUI he could call the law firm of Dolittle and Wen. He learned that if he needed a product to keep eggs from sticking in the frying pan or waffles from sticking in the waffle iron he could order “The AMAZING Spray Lube” for only three payments of $19.99. But wait, if he acted now they would double his order.
Last but not least he learned that Dollar Bill’s Cash 4 Cars was willing to sacrifice an almost new 1998 Ford Taurus for only $9999.99! and it only had 285,000 miles on the odometer.
Dollar Bill was urging him to rush right down because “deals this good don’t last”.