OLWG · writing

OLWG #39 – Shiny Stuff

 My 1000th post, and it’s written for OLWG #39

impassively, she tried to stub out her cigarette on the saucer
she even set it on the chipped porcelain piece
but it wouldn’t quit – it slowly continued to smoke
until she picked it up

bright red nails

and dropped it in the dregs of her coffee

I watched it all, unwittingly from across the table
I watched as she pushed a fleck of tobacco to her lips with the tip of her tongue
unblinkingly, she stared back as
she reached up to pluck it from her lips

bright red lips

and flick it to the floor, somewhere beneath the table

“Well?” she inquired
“Well, what?” I asked her back
“Well, don’t you agree? We don’t make sense together
we should cut our losses” she swiped the back of her hand beneath her eyes

bright red eyes

she may have been crying earlier I know I had been

at that exact moment, as if on cue, a murder of crows lifted off the grass
the grass strip – in the middle of the street
– from the median between the lanes of traffic
she turned her head and followed the birds with her eyes

bright red sun

until they disappeared into the setting sun

her gaze followed the birds
my gaze followed the waitress weaving through tables and headed
our way; tall, thin, lithe, young, radiant

bright red hair

who smiled as she slid our check onto the table

I smiled back at her just when she
turned her eyes back to me
searchingly – pleading for agreement
“that’s mostly true,” I concurred as I
turned my eyes back to the waitress

This week’s prompts were:

  1. It’s mostly true
  2. we don’t make sense together
  3. Derision

Don’t think! Write!
You have 25 minutes but if it takes longer – just don’t tell anyone.

8 thoughts on “OLWG #39 – Shiny Stuff

  1. T! You are a Millennial! Oh, you ancient blogger of the Sea of Blogs!
    I’ve said it before: you have a grasp of the Noir and of romantic entanglements. Mix it with the backdrop of an ordinary day in the life, and I have to say, your writing always makes perfect sense, in prose or poetry (and now, I have to scrap what I was working on for this prompt and rethink. Damn your good writing! wink-and-a-nod)

    Liked by 2 people

  2. So languid. I imagine him sitting there with half closed eyes, observing all that goes on around, getting reading to make his move. He’s physically, there but his mind is always flitting elsewhere. No wonder she’s frustrated. Great pictures and characterisation, and structure.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Yes, I agree a bit noir – And for this piece Murder fits. Though I also like ‘Congress’ which is actually a group of ravens, which are also called an ‘unkindness’. Crows are so misunderstood though…

    Liked by 1 person

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