Thanks to Ms Rose for the inspiration. It’s kind of silly but I couldn’t resist.
Bettie, a genuinely overweight, middle aged woman stands at the pharmacist’s counter waiting for someone to tell her why she was given the wrong prescription. While she waits, she does what she can to put off horrible thoughts of what might have happened should she have gone ahead and taken the wrong drugs.
A woman’s voice behind her says, “Your ass looks really good in those pants!”
Stunned, Bettie turns and confronts the other woman. “Well…I have a lot of it…”
“No, I mean it! You look great in those pants! Who are they?”
“I don’t know. I got them at Macy’s; on sale.”
“Seriously, you look great!”
“Do you really mean that?”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t.”
The woman held her hand out to Bettie, “I didn’t introduce myself,” she said, “I’m Wilma Stokes. I’m new in town. Fred and I bought a house near the corner of Third and Carlisle.”
“I’m sorry,” Bettie replied, “you and your husband are Fred and Wilma?”
“I know; it’s horrible; isn’t it? At least our family name is Stokes and not Flintstone!”
They both laughed and then lapsed into a silence there in the queue. Bettie was fidgeting a bit, seemingly uncomfortable. Finally she spoke up, “Is that the grey and white house near the east end of the block?”
“Yeah, yeah, with the flat roof.”
“OMG! I live just over your back fence on Cobblestone Way. I’m right behind you! I’m Bettie, by the way. I’m so glad we met.”
“Oh, me too! Hey listen, Fred and I are planning a housewarming this weekend. Maybe you could come?”
“We’d love to! Can I bring my husband along?” Bettie asked, smiling.
Wilma got a serious look on her face, “His name’s not Barney, is it?”
“Oh, heaven’s no, his name’s Steve.” she said, “Steve Rubble!” she kind of mumbled afterwards.
“Get out. It is not – NO FUCKIN’ WAY! I need to buy you a drink!” she looked at her watch. “Look, it’s almost noon – where can we find an open bar?”
“There’s the Martini Lounge. It’s downtown. I think they open for breakfast.”
They both stepped out of the line, spun on their heels, linked arms and marched out of the pharmacy.